My husband went to the dentist today.....
He came home with a bill, the promise of more work to be done and more bills. He also arrived with a complimentary electrical toothbrush.
May I say.....somethings are not all they promise.
I currently have minty fresh mouth taste tinged with the salty, earthy taste of blood. There is toothpaste sprinkled in three directions across two walls and a mirror in my bathroom. Speckling not only my reflection but also myself, I, exhibiting great intelligence, examined the devise as it spun wildly. Minty Madness. Better to turn these things off before exploring.
Brandishing an electric toothbrush in the bathroom gives one a sense of ones own finiteness and the reality that your teeth are not forever. I felt like every time I started to brush my teeth I was going to disconnect my brain from my skull. It was like riding in an auto risk-shaw over a rocky dirt road while holding onto a hand whisk and biting down on a mint mouth guard. It was an all around dental experience in the comfort of my own home. This must be tried at home but may I gently suggest not in public.
And as lovely as that 3D experience felt and as much as it made me laugh right out loud this was not my favorite gift of the day. Nope peacock gloves came in the mail. Peacock gloves with little hobo fingers and a pocket that folds over to make mittens when the cold proves too much. Complete with a little button for darling appeal. They are glorious. It is lovely to be known and to be loved. It makes me warm and fuzzy all over and I smile with my white rather traumatized teeth.
He came home with a bill, the promise of more work to be done and more bills. He also arrived with a complimentary electrical toothbrush.
May I say.....somethings are not all they promise.
I currently have minty fresh mouth taste tinged with the salty, earthy taste of blood. There is toothpaste sprinkled in three directions across two walls and a mirror in my bathroom. Speckling not only my reflection but also myself, I, exhibiting great intelligence, examined the devise as it spun wildly. Minty Madness. Better to turn these things off before exploring.
Brandishing an electric toothbrush in the bathroom gives one a sense of ones own finiteness and the reality that your teeth are not forever. I felt like every time I started to brush my teeth I was going to disconnect my brain from my skull. It was like riding in an auto risk-shaw over a rocky dirt road while holding onto a hand whisk and biting down on a mint mouth guard. It was an all around dental experience in the comfort of my own home. This must be tried at home but may I gently suggest not in public.
And as lovely as that 3D experience felt and as much as it made me laugh right out loud this was not my favorite gift of the day. Nope peacock gloves came in the mail. Peacock gloves with little hobo fingers and a pocket that folds over to make mittens when the cold proves too much. Complete with a little button for darling appeal. They are glorious. It is lovely to be known and to be loved. It makes me warm and fuzzy all over and I smile with my white rather traumatized teeth.
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